Janelle Alex - The Women's Shaman & Transpersonal Biz Coach

She's mentored & coached thousands. NOW – Your Soul is Calling. She helps you answer the call.

How Can Your Dark Side Make You More Successful?

How can your dark side make you more successful?

Are you constantly trying to fit in -be what or who someone else expects you to be?  

Won’t they point and criticize you?

I’ve been there. After all, if you stand out -if you’re the tallest poppy, won’t you get cut down? Won’t people look at you and point at you and criticize you because you don’t fit into their box. You don’t fit into what they believe you should be or you don’t behave in the way they expect?

lightning

In the clip I share below, Tim Minchin sings about this perspective. I’m sharing his video clip because he’s frickin’ amazing. But, here’s the deal he didn’t fit into the music industry’s expectations. He didn’t fit into the box of what a pianist is supposed to be. Nor did he fit into what a comedian is supposed to be like.

Does he have a dark side?

Is he deep? Does he have a darkside? Hell yes! We all do for pity sakes, but Tim worked with his. In fact, he went far beyond just working with it. He knows his inner powers -his amazing strengths- and he’s ran with them to create an exceptionally successful career all while sharing his powerful perspectives.

If you’re impressed by Tim, find out more about him here: www.timminchin.com.

Don’t hide your dark side from others

When you succumb to hiding your dark side, your uniqueness, and your crazy f****d up ideas from others…well, you end up just being another wallflower. No one will notice you. 

If you would prefer to just remain quiet, do your job, then go home and plop down watching a little TV or reading a book, then I’m not the right person to lift you up or kick you in the ass anyway 🙂 

Your absolute truth

But, the absolute truth is that you’re here because you want to make a difference in the world, you want to have a bigger impact, you want more influence – right? You’re here because you’ve been feeling the call. You know it’s your time.

A part of me feels like I can’t express this idea any better than Tim’s Dark Side performance. On the other hand, there are always numerous ways to express our views. Music is huge to me -after all I was a dancer and taught dance for a big portion of my life. That’s why I chose to use this example to get you to stop and think about not being like everyone else. To encourage you to stop giving in to other’s expectations of what you should do. 

Music and artists can reach into your soul

Music and artists can reach into your soul and touch pieces you may not have been able to touch yourself. In fact, one of my favorite exercises I teach when working with clients on bridging their “soul gap” is having them create a musical autobiography and then go deeper with it.  

Your mini-exercise today: Go listen to your favorite artists and really listen to the lyrics. Listen to your heart and listen to your soul. What do you feel? What lyrics stand out to you? What emotions are you feeling?

Oh, first, watch the video above of Tim playing the Dark Side. It’s deep, funny, and mind-blowing amazing piano playing!  

Recognize your dark side…and be bold enough to show it

Back to the overall point of today’s post…recognize your dark side. Embrace it in a way that works best for you. Be brave enough to show your uniqueness. Be bold enough to stand told and shout your message -in your style- from the rooftops.

Note – Tim sings near the end around the 12:20 mark: “F***ing I can have a dark side too. F****ing woo!”  I love this!

Your own personal crazy

When you know your own personal crazy, you know your own strengths and you learn how to use those strengths (your inner powers) in a way that inspires you and brings you the attention you want and need to make a real difference in the world, then you know how your dark side can make you more successful!


Janelle Alex – Transpersonal Business Coach & Shaman for Successful Women who feel the call to make a real difference in the world, but don’t know where to start.

You’re a Butterfly That Can’t Spread Her Wings – Soul Gap

You’re a Butterfly That Can’t Spread Her Wings

Your rebel soul is tired of just existing, of just getting by.  You’re a butterfly that feels like she can’t fully spread her wings and show off all her gorgeous colors.  There is no doubt that discovering or perhaps, rediscovering what your soul is calling you to do is vital if you want to truly live from a place of happiness and joy.  You make it through every day.  Your body gets fed…sometimes with a little too much food or maybe even a little too much wine, but is your mind being fed?  Is your soul being fed?

You’ve done what you thought you were supposed to do.  The expectations of others, as well as the expectations you placed on yourself, have brought about the life you now lead, but when you hit the breaking point and just can’t take the endless feeling of emptiness inside, you have to admit that there must be a big gap between what your soul’s intention in this life is and what you are actually doing.  This what I call the soul gap™.

Soul Gap™ = 
your soul’s mission – your active participation

Initially, the gap may not seem so bad.  You get by.  You talk yourself into believing it’s all okay.  Well-meaning friends, family, and even some coaches, teachers, mentors, tell you that it’ll all be okay if you just meditate a few minutes every day.  They tell you that you just need to start a gratitude journal or make a dream board.  If you just practice a little self-care, you’ll be fine.   Right? 

None of that works…

Come on!  We know that none of that works if you’re truly in the middle of “Oh my god, what is the point of my life?! Seriously, I know there’s something more…something else I’m supposed to be doing!”

It changed my life, but it wasn’t a one time deal

Now, don’t get me wrong.  Meditation, shamanic journeying, gratitude journals, dream boards, affirmations, reading and absorbing personal growth books like a crazed librarian jacked-up on coffee are actually great things to do.  I practice meditation.  I do a “Janelle” version of a shamanic journey weekly without fail.  I suck at gratitude journals (ack!), but I’ve created dream boards, moon boards, read and studied tons of personal growth books.  I’ve invested over $20,000 in coaches and mentors, and my entire graduate education was in transpersonal and spiritual psychology…so another $100,000+ invested.  And, yes my transpersonal studies changed my life.  In fact, I give credit to my grad school mentor more than anyone else, but it wasn’t just one thing or a one time deal.

The 180 degree turn

It took years of personal growth work or…did it?  In all honesty, it happened instantly.  I knew that moment in my dance studio that I had hit the wall.  Then, when I was finally doing the work on myself, I made a 180 degree turn.  One exercise completely shifted how I looked at myself and my family in an instant. Let me share that exercise with you now…

Excerpt from Soul Gap: Rediscovering the colors of your soul and fulfilling your life’s mission.

 

A Life Shift

I was working on an assignment in my master’s degree program at the Institute of Transpersonal Psychology in California.  Papers were spread out all over my desk, the floor and on top of the filing cabinet.  Even though I agree that we need to declutter for energy to flow better, when the message is powerful enough it’ll break through the mess, the clutter, the chaos…nothing will stop it.  It’s okay.  I promise you don’t have to be in a perfect space or a perfect state of mind to experience a shift.  I reiterate that it helps, but it’s only one piece of the puzzle.

That one exercise changed my life

The exercise I was working on required that I think of myself as a little girl.  I was to imagine  being upset by something – a particular incident if I felt secure enough emotionally to go there.   Then, I was to imagine my adult self comforting my child self through the situation.

As my adult self wrapped its arms around my imagined version of my child self and let her know she was loved and that I had compassion for her, I broke down and started sobbing.  In that instant, I finally learned how to love myself and have compassion for ME.  I had always been so hard on myself.  But, finally I knew it was okay to just be me!

With or without your parents’ love

It doesn’t matter if your parents love you more than anything – mine did and still do.  It doesn’t matter if you had great friends and amazing teachers.  None of that can truly make you love yourself.  That has to come from within.  And, one exercise can’t necessarily make the difference either.  It’s just that the timing was right and I implemented what was given to me.  I’m sure you’ve heard it said many times over, but when the student is ready the teacher appears.


Answer the Call of Your Soul Assessment

Schedule a 20-30 minute call with me – it’s totally complimentary.  I’ll help you discover what your soul is calling you to do right now.

If we’re a good fit for one another and you feel compelled to take the next steps needed to Answer the Call of Your Soul, I’ll offer to talk with you about how we can work together.

Janelle Alex – Transpersonal Business Coach & Shaman for Women who feel the call to make a real difference in the world, but don’t know where to start.

Soul Gap: More Daily Grind – Scenario Three

soul gap

The Daily Grind – 3 of 3

Recap: Day in and day out, it’s the same old thing – the daily grind.  You trudge to work or you search for new clients or you do another load of laundry or you rush home before the kids get off the bus or maybe, just maybe, you sit at the computer for hours hunting desperately for what it is you’re supposed to be doing in the world.  Which scenario below do you recognize yourself in?

Excerpt from Soul Gap: Rediscovering the colors of your soul and fulfilling your life’s mission.

Scenario Number Three…

Kids are grown and out of the house

Your kids are grown and out of the house.  You have a full calendar filled with amazing clients.  You have a good relationship.  Your finances are in good shape.  You’re healthy.  You get to travel a couple of times a year.  You should be totally happy – right? 

Why do you keep feeling lost?

So, why do you keep feeling lost?  Feeling like there is something you’re missing?  Feeling like you’re supposed to be doing something bigger?  You look in the mirror and ask, “Crap! Who am I?  I mean really.  Who is the person looking back at me?  I know her, but I don’t.  Have I really lost myself?” 

Are you running in place and running out of time?

At this point in your life, you suddenly feel like you’re overlooking something.  You want to do something crazy – something for yourself, but something that makes a big difference in the world.  You want to feel full of life again.  You have a deep desire to set your soul free, but you feel like you’re running in place and running out of time!

Which one is you?

Which scenario from these last three weeks did you connect with the most?  One of them?  More than one?  A mix?  It’s time to discover your soul gap, dear one! 

Missed scenario one or scenario two – go back and read them now.


Janelle Alex – Transpersonal Business Coach & Shaman for women who want to make a real difference in the world, but don’t know where to start.

Soul Gap: More Daily Grind – Scenario Two

The Daily Grind – 2 of 3

Recap: Day in and day out, it’s the same old thing.  You trudge to work or you search for new clients or you do another load of laundry or you rush home before the kids get off the bus or maybe, just maybe, you sit at the computer for hours hunting desperately for what it is you’re supposed to be doing in the world.  Which scenario below do you recognize yourself in?

Excerpt from Soul Gap: Rediscovering the colors of your soul and fulfilling your life’s mission.

Scenario Number Two…

You wake up late

You wake up late.  Rush out the door only to discover traffic is a worse nightmare today than it usually is.  So, there is no hope of making it to work on time.  Your boss is gonna be pissed.  God, he is such an angry person! 

Only 10% battery power

You try to turn on some great music to jam to while being stuck on the freeway, but your phone is only at 10% battery power…and your charger is tucked in your purse, which is tossed on the passenger side floorboard.  So, you try the radio…no luck.  You just get tons of political news – OMG! What’s Trump done this time? and a bunch of other negative news. 

Weekend plans?  Nope…gotta work to avoid being fired

Your sweetheart texts you. (You’re at a complete stop with the car in park in this traffic, so you read it.)  Well, there go your weekend getaway plans…your sweetie has to work all weekend on a big project or risk being fired.  You soooo needed the time away. 

Traffic is moving, but you still feel stuck

You draw a long breath.  Traffic starts to move, but you still feel stuck.  It’s like you’re stuck in a cycle, but you know there has to be more to life than this.


Janelle Alex – Writing Coach for wild women who want to make a real difference in the world, but don’t know where to start.

Soul Gap – More Daily Grind – Scenario One

The Daily Grind – 1 of 3

Day in and day out, it’s the same old thing.  You trudge to work or you search for new clients or you do another load of laundry or you rush home before the kids get off the bus or maybe, just maybe, you sit at the computer for hours hunting desperately for what it is you’re supposed to be doing in the world.  Which scenario below do you recognize yourself in?

Excerpt from Soul Gap: Rediscovering the colors of your soul and fulfilling your life’s mission.

Scenario Number One…

Then, you remember it’s a weekday.

It’s another day.  You wake up to the blare of your alarm clock.  You stretch, yawn and pull the covers back over your head.  Then, you remember it’s a weekday. 

No long hot shower for you

Next minute you’re rushing here and there to get everything done that everyone else needs from you.  A nice long hot shower is very likely not in the cards for you.  Instead, it’s a quick jump in, get washed and get out. 

Everybody wants something from you

Before you can get clothes on or dry your hair, the dog wants out, the kids are asking where they left their books for history and science class, your sexy (OMG he left the dresser drawers open again) partner is yelling up the stairs asking where his phone is, and your mother is texting to ask how to log-in to Facebook, again! 

And, the dog…oh no!

Ack, you just told her how yesterday.  The kids books are in their backpacks like always.  Your partner’s phone is on the bedside table…like every morning.  And, the dog…oh no!  Poor girl, she couldn’t wait any longer.  Why couldn’t someone else take her out?!  Now, you have an extra mess to clean up before you can get everyone out of the house and get to work.


Janelle Alex – Transpersonal Business Coach & Shaman for wild women who want to make a real difference in the world, but don’t know where to start.

Soul Gap: Bridging the Gap

bridging the gap

Bridging the Gap

Stopping on the razor’s edge of my soul gap may have happened in an instant, but understanding it and figuring out how to build a bridge over the gap didn’t happen over night.  For me, it took well over a decade! 

Excerpt from Soul Gap: Rediscovering the colors of your soul and fulfilling your life’s mission.

Trial and Error

A lot of trial and error.  A lot of tears and meltdowns.  A lot of friends and family falling away.  A lot of new friendships being developed.  It took opening to a much deeper connection to my spirituality, my personal spiritual practices and my spirit guides.  It took me learning how to have self-compassion and love for ME. 

Gifts, knowledge and struggles

After all these years, I know without a doubt that my gifts, my knowledge, my struggles and my success are all meant to be shared with others, so they – so YOU – don’t have to wait as long as I did.  And, you don’t have to do it alone!  

So, here I am…finally.  I’m not about to leave you behind.  Raise your hands in the air and let me see you.  I’m right here…looking for you.


Janelle Alex – Transpersonal Business Coach & Shaman for wild women who want to make a real difference in the world, but don’t know where to start.

Soul Gap: The Internal Battle

stormy Panama City BeachSoul Gap: The Internal Battle

Your internal battle has begun…and so did mine

The internal battle had begun.  Over the next couple of years, I thought and thought of how I could retire from teaching or at the very least figure out what it was that I was supposed to be doing that was something more.  I couldn’t put my finger on what that meant…I just knew I was supposed to be doing “more”.  You’re reading this book; therefore, I’m going to take a wild guess that you know exactly what I mean.  You’re looking for your something more, too.

 

Excerpt from Soul Gap: Rediscovering the colors of your soul and fulfilling your life’s mission.

When you don’t have the support you need

I started looking at going back and getting my psychology degree, but my then-husband, while standing in our laundry room with the washer sloshing through another load, flat out said to me, “If you go to college, we’ll end up divorced.”  Ha!  Apparently, he was afraid I’d meet new people, grow and change.  Well, guess what?  The divorce came anyway within a couple of years when I finally had the courage to take my son and leave.

The soul is begging for big changes

By this point, my soul was begging me to make some really big changes.  I was seeking a transformation that I didn’t yet understand.  I was supposed to do more with my life, but I was doing a lot for my students.  I was supposed to travel and expand my boundaries far beyond my hometown, but I was traveling the country with my students.  I was supposed to touch more lives, but I couldn’t figure out how to do that when my schedule was already packed out.

No excuses for not doing it sooner

When public internet was in it’s infancy, I started a new business to support other dance studio owners.  However, I didn’t have the financial backing to make it freaking amazing.  I didn’t have the knowledge or a mentor to guide me.  I finally threw in the towel and gave up.  Now, I can blame that on a lack of support in so many areas in my life as well as edging towards the divorce, but I’m not one for excuses.  Nope, I could’ve found a way to have made it work had I really, really wanted it.  It’s just that it wasn’t the something more I was supposed to be doing, and I believe deep down I knew that.

 

Tug-o-war

It felt like a tug-o-war, sometimes, between what I was expected to do and what I was meant to do.  Without question, that internal battle raged within me for years.  At times, I would feel angry.  Other times, I would just sit and cry.  Mostly, I just felt a deep sense of frustration and confusion.  I was running in place, and I desperately wanted to break free, rediscover my dreams and find my path out of the maze of confusion.  I had no doubt that someone (more like many someones) were waiting on me to help them find their way out of the maze, too.


Janelle Alex – Transpersonal Business Coach & Shaman for wild women who want to make a real difference in the world, but don’t know where to start.

Women It’s Time to Stand Up

women

It’s time to stand up!

No more being quiet.

No more doing what’s expected.

No more letting someone else lead and tell you what to do.

It’s your turn to lead.

Here’s to creating more women leaders with fierce passion and grace.


Answer the Call of Your Soul Assessment

Schedule a 20-30 minute call with me – it’s totally complimentary.  I’ll help you discover what your soul is calling you to do right now.

If we’re a good fit for one another and you feel compelled to take the next steps needed to Answer the Call of Your Soul, I’ll offer to talk with you about how we can work together.

Janelle Alex – Transpersonal Business Coach & Shaman for wild women who want to make a real difference in the world, but don’t know where to start.

Answer the Call of Your Soul – Even When Life is Chaotic

Answer the Call of the Your Soul

Your Dreams Are Waiting for YOU

There isn’t time to figure it out

I’ve heard it so many times – “I feel like there’s something bigger I’m supposed to be doing, but I don’t have time to figure it out.”

Really?  Do you think the answer will just come to you magically as you’re going through your day?  Sure, there is a teeny-tiny chance that that might happen.  But, it is highly unlikely.

Tomorrow will be the same unless

Tomorrow will be the exact same as today unless you make the commitment to change it.  No one else is going to follow your dreams – only you.

Wait!! That isn’t totally true.  Somebody else may be following your dreams – BUT it’s really their dream.  It just so happens that it’s so similar to yours that it seems like it is yours.  

Stop being selfish

When you hold yourself back due to fear or the excuse of not having enough time, you’re actually being selfish.  There are people who need you (or maybe it’s the environment or animals that need you).  

When you stay stuck in your life and feel afraid to go in a new direction, then you’re keeping your gifts, your strengths, your ability to uplift/protect/inspire, your inner qualities – you’re keeping them all from those who need them most.  

It’s time to stop being selfish – because that’s what holding back really is.

Take a Bold Leap

Isn’t it time to take a bold leap in your life?  Isn’t it time to create real change within you, so that you can make a bigger difference in the world?

I get that change can be super scary.  We’re human and we’re taught to fear change – to step outside of our comfort zone.  I hear you.  And…I’ve been there.

But, you don’t have to figure this out on your own.  My calling is to be here to empower you, inspire you and guide you.  My something bigger in the world is helping you take a bold leap and step into your life’s mission fully and brazenly in a way that fits you and your lifestyle!

If you’re ready, then let’s have a conversation. 

Answer the Call of Your Soul Assessment

Schedule a 20-30 minute call with me – it’s totally complimentary.  I’ll help you discover what your soul is calling you to do right now.

If we’re a good fit for one another and you feel compelled to take the next steps needed to Answer the Call of Your Soul, I’ll offer to talk with you about how we can work together.

Janelle Alex – Transpersonal Business Coach & Shaman for wild women who want to make a real difference in the world, but don’t know where to start.

Soul Gap: Shouldn’t I Be Happy

Sunset at seaSoul Gap: Shouldn’t We Be Happy

I was successful…and you’re likely are, too..

I had a very successful business – shouldn’t I’ve just been happy?  Some of my students were given the opportunity to perform during the half-time show of the Sugar Bowl in New Orleans, and later during a Harlem Globetrotters game at DePaw University.  In fact, over the next few years I took other students to perform during half-time of the Orange Bowl in Miami and the Alamo Bowl in San Antonio. 

Many of my kids competed regionally and nationally and earned tons and tons of awards.  They did a great job for being recreational dancers from a small redneck town 🙂  Those students who didn’t compete performed locally or just enjoyed their classes.

 

Excerpt from Soul Gap: Rediscovering the colors of your soul and fulfilling your life’s mission.

But it all came crashing in on me…

My class rosters filled every year to the point of overflowing at times.  People recognized me in the community, and sometimes shocked me by treating me like a local celebrity – that still blows my mind.  But, on that one day everything just came crashing in on me.  I LOVED my girls and the handful of boys I taught.  I adored most of their parents. 

Laugh and have fun when encountering challenges

All of my classes, from my pre-schoolers to my high schoolers to my oldest student, who was 78 at the time, got way more than how to correctly do a plié or a step-shuffle-ball-change.  I taught them to laugh and have fun when encountering challenges.  I taught them to never give up.  I taught them to have confidence in themselves.  I taught them to put trust in the right coach or mentor.  I taught them to go after their dreams.  But, I had hit this wall where it felt like I was just starting over every August with “step, heel, step, heel, step heel, toe”.

It was the same thing over and over…

Autumn after autumn, I was once again choreographing new routines for the spring recital and competitions throughout the year, and teaching little Susie how to do a cartwheel.  Of course, a lot of my students were with me from age three or four all the way into high school, and they certainly weren’t starting over every year, but my soul was calling…and it wouldn’t take no for an answer.

Geesh, get over it!

Yet, I still kept asking myself, “Come on.  Look at all you have.  All you’ve accomplished.  How much those kids adore you.  Shouldn’t you be happy?  What the hell else do you want?  Geesh  Janelle, get over it!”

Don’t ignore your future and your dreams believing that you should just get over it!  


Janelle Alex – Transpersonal Business Coach & Shaman for wild women who want to make a real difference in the world, but don’t know where to start.

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